What Does Laura Want?

I understand that people want to know what I’m going to do next.

A neighbor asked me what does Laura want.  He asked this after I told him I’ve been doing what I want.

And yet he and other’s want something else.  I’m not sure what.

The wonderful thing about this time with Gpa was we both got to do the things that made us happy.  He liked to go for a ride.  I’d take him to go juggle.

He loved spending time with the kids and would toss a bean bag to them. – bonus

I got my watercolors out and got to get several pictures done.  I haven’t gotten them out since he got sick until tonight.  What a nice way to spend an evening.

I’m creating books for the grandbabies that focus on what Gpa liked.  Below is a grasshopper for the bug book.  Gpa liked to tell people that there is a certain spot on the grasshopper’s leg that if you touched it, the leg would fall off.   This allows the grasshopper to get away from birds.

Now that I’ve gotten my music room set up, I’ve been playing daily.

But saying that I want to paint, play music and juggle isn’t what people want to hear.

I’m not sure what they want me to say.

Maybe that I’m happy. I’m sad that Gpa is gone. I miss him.  But I have all these wonderful memories that I get to remember when I paint, play music and juggle.

My hope and prayer for you is that you find what makes you happy and that you allow yourself to do it/be it.


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  • catterel  On March 22, 2013 at 10:37 am

    People mean well but can be clumsy! I love your grasshopper – do you know ee cummins poem about the grasshopper? I think it would fit with your present mood! Laura, you are doing exactly what is right for Laura. Not everyone realises what a privilege it is to be able to spend quality time with an elderly relative, even if that person has deteriorated badly, they only see the stress and hard work.

  • catterel  On March 22, 2013 at 10:43 am

    re grasshopper and ee cummings – I just found this site with interesting commentaries. http://www.english.illinois.edu/maps/poets/a_f/cummings/grasshopper.htm

    • nothousebound  On March 25, 2013 at 7:54 am

      No, I didn’t know about ee cummings poem about the grasshopper. Though we did read a couple of his poems in school. I live what he does with words on the page.

      Thank you for sharing.

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