Bad Manners Excuse

I can’t remember if I’ve blogged on this before but it’s come up again, with another person.  I have to say that it really goes all over me when someone excuses bad behavior with, “That’s just the way they are.”

My husband said that about his mother.  At the time, I wondered if I’d get a turn at being ‘that way.’

I say it’s down right plain rude.  I think these people have learned this is the way to get what they want.  The rest of us get out of they way and let them.

But I can tell you, if I started acting this way, people would not be making excuses.  Oh, wait, maybe I can, maybe I could tell them oh, I’m sorry but I am dealing with a death in the family and see how long I can get away with it.

However,  I don’t want to behave that way.  I like who I am and if it’s too nice, well so be it.  Though I am going to stand up for myself more now. ( I don’t have to account to parents and grandparent or get to rely on them)

I do have another thing that I have to deal with.  Last year when it was time to tell the church what we plan to give next year(this year) I told the guy in charge that I don’t like to pledge in general.  I do plan to give I just don’t like the idea of a group expecting a certain amount.  Especially since Gpa was beginning to decline and I didn’t know how long we’d have.

I didn’t want a pledge hanging over my head as I looked for a job.

I got a letter the other day, showing what I have given for 2013 and how much pledge I have left. There were a lot of zero’s partly because for most of Feb I was out-of-town and some weeks I’m giving cash and I haven’t bothered to put it in an envelope and put my name on it.  BECAUSE I didn’t think I had a pledge.  I thought my giving was between me and God.

I am so frustrated that I’m afraid I’ll end up being a shrieking shrew.

I will be starting a job in May (Yay!!! this is so exciting and such a relieve) so I’m trying to remember that I’ll be able to cover this amount of money over the year.  But I keep going back to the conversation and this man knows I don’t have a job.

All he has asked me these past months is if I have a job yet. (or if I’ll read or play music or snuff out the candles)  He hasn’t asked how I’m doing, if I need anything, are my bills covered, am I getting enough to eat, or sleep.  And I’m now thinking he’s asking about the job because of the pledge.

I can tell you that when asked this year, I’m only going to pledge a dollar so I can meet it the first time I give.  And then I’ll be back to the freedom of my giving being between God and myself.

Sorry, didn’t mean to ramble but this really bothers me.

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  • catterel  On April 26, 2013 at 9:40 pm

    Laura, of course your giving is between you and God. He loves a cheerful giver, cheerful, not miserable. I’d try having a talk with this guy about the spirit of the law – and if he doesn’t get it, seriously consider changing to a different church community. Staying right with God is more important than staying right with a fellowship. I send you a big hug.

    • nothousebound  On April 29, 2013 at 10:57 pm

      I did talk to him and told him I don’t pledge and he said he would take it off. Whew!

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