Tag Archives: ride

Not that Last Ride

Last Wednesday, I had decided that it would be the last time Gpa went to daycare.  He had gotten to the point he could not stand on his own.

It was a cold and rainy day.  I almost said never mind and kept him home.  But I had a couple of things I needed to get done before becoming housebound.  And I had made plans to have lunch with a friend that I didn’t want to miss.

On the way to daycare, I was sad that this would be his last ride.  He loves them so much.

But I was wrong.  It wasn’t his last ride. On Friday, a beautiful sunny day.  Thank you Texas weather! My daughter needed a ride to her car.  I told her I could do it if she helped me put Gpa in the car.  She asked what about when we got home as she would go to work after dropping her car at the shop.

I told her that I can get him out of the car better than I can get him in the car.  As it worked out the home health nurse wanted to meet about that time and she helped me get him out of the car.

The nurse had the “H” word talk with me. So over the weekend I looked up a few hospice companies and one is coming tomorrow.

In the mean time, the truck is still not fixed and my daughter loaded up Gpa into the car yesterday and we had another lovely ride.  Sure he slept through it but he’s been doing that lately.  It was nice to be able to give him another ride.

But I don’t know it I’ll learn not to say this is the last time for …. or not, we’ll see.

Today Nietzsche was Wrong

Nietzsche has been quoted to say, “That which does not kill us makes us stronger. ”

This morning, I wasn’t stronger, I became my baser self.

Gpa went into the bathroom, so I followed and started to help him. He was in the middle of pooping.  So there he is standing in the bathroom, hanging onto the towel rack, pooping.  Gravity was doing a swell job and poop was landing on his pants, shoes and floor.

I started yelling at him to sit down and tried to guide him to the toilet.  Gpa did not let go and the towel rack came with him.

I am so glad no one was hurt. I’ve been trying to get a real grab bar added to the order for the hospital bed.  Towel racks are not made for bearing a person’s weight.

He’s happy when he has a cookie, a coffee or a ride.  He is not happy when he is in the bathroom and I am yelling at him.  He isn’t aware of the poop.  He tells me he is never coming back here again.

I am not physically stronger.  Taking care of Gpa has thrown my back out of whack.

I am not spiritually stronger.  It is torture to watch Gpa slowly deteriorate.  He has a bed sore, a sore on the toe of one foot and two toes on his other foot is purple.

I am not mentally stronger.  I am drained.

I am going to bed now.  Hopefully, we’ll feel better in the morning.

We’ll see.